Paul & Sarah (+ Kieran!) » Pregnancy

Storytime? (37w)

Sarah — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 17:17:23 +0000

We have been incredibly blessed by friends and family during this pregnancy and showered with gifts. Our nursery is in fantastic shape, just waiting for us to bring our little man home in a few days.

Except for one thing, that I’m really only realizing now with all the parenting and baby care stuff I’m reading. (My reading material has shifted from pregnancy-related to labor/delivery and now to ‘how the heck do we take care of this thing?’ type titles and magazines.) We have like NO BOOKS for the little guy. Apparently we’re supposed to start reading to him nearly immediately – and seriously, we have like two books! (Including Goodnight Moon.)

So, friends and family: suggestions please! We’re huge fans of Amazon, but the selection is so overwhelming when I go to look at kid’s books. I need guidance! What do you have fond memories of reading to your children? What books do your babies/toddlers/kids love? What book will you go all Van Gogh on yourself if you have to read aloud one more time? I’ll probably just build a huge wishlist to whittle down with all your suggestions, so all types of books are welcome – stuff to read to baby, stuff to let baby actually get his moist little hands on: all of it!

Thanks in advance once again for your help, everyone. I cannot believe that the little critter that is kicking me on the inside as I type this will be on the outside in a matter of a day or two.

Cleared for Launch (36w6d)

Sarah — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 00:09:47 +0000

Today was my last prenatal appointment. Short and sweet.

BP: 154/97 both times
Fluid: 5.7 in only two pockets (dunno if that’s good that they were big, or bad that there were only two.)
Monitoring: Little man seemed content to kick at the monitors, so he didn’t need to be buzzed.
Group B Strep test was positive, so I’ll need 2-3 doses of antibiotics during the course of labor. No big deal, just one more thing going into the IV.

We chatted for a bit with our favorite nurse, Paula. She’s a neat lady. Hugs all around when we left.

So we’re cleared to arrive at the hospital at 7:30 on Sunday. This is getting very real all of the sudden.

Still here (36w4d)

Sarah — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 02:01:50 +0000

Quick & Dirty update:

BP was 155/99, so in the unhappy-ish range and up from Monday.
Monitoring went well (no buzzer needed)
Fluid is back up a bit to 5.7 (although Dr. Schwartz told us on Monday that he has a sneaking suspicion my fluid has always been a little higher than AFI readings are saying – just because on someone of my shape and size there’s more ‘nooks and crannies’ for fluid to hide in. Doesn’t make visualizing them or getting to them for an amnio any easier – but it does explain why he hasn’t been all Chicken Little like the nurses for the last two weeks.)
Gave blood and pee to re-check stuff and was sent home (as opposed to the hospital.)

If I wasn’t scheduled for induction on Sunday, they’d be having me do a 24-hour urine starting tomorrow. So thank God for small favors.

Worrisome upper belly pains + increasing headache + vision changes are making Dr. Schwartz look at me funny, but he let me go home today, so I consider that a victory. It’s possible the lab results will change that tomorrow, but we’re thinking positive. In the meantime, I’m trying to lay low – which is fairly easy today cuz I kinda feel like crap between an upset tummy, headache and the upper belly pains.

I guess I should clarify that the induction on Sunday isn’t something we’re expecting to go especially quickly. At not quite 37 weeks, I’m high and tight (not dilated or effaced at all) so I’m assuming it’s gonna take at least the full 12-hour cycle of the Cervidil to get things moving, if not a second round. (Our prepared childbirth instructors warned that it’s not at all uncommon for two rounds of Cervidil to be needed for induction before 38 weeks.) I’m not contracting anymore though, thank goodness. If the contractions from the amniocentesis had continued more than 8 hours or so, that would have been a problem. So while a shared birthday with Daddy is possible for June 30th, I’m not aiming for it. Personally, I think the little guy is gonna arrive on the 29th – but the 28th would be even better! As always – safe and healthy baby and Mama is all we’re after, however that comes about.

I’m back at Dr. Schwartz’s office on Friday for monitoring and possibly an amniocentesis if there’s a big fluid pocket that the doc of the day (not Dr. Schwartz) feels like trying to stab at. (Uug, that sounds gross, doesn’t it?) I’ll say goodbye to the girls in the office who we’ve gotten friendly with (I swear, it’s like Cheers when we come in now: a chorus of “Hi, Sarah” wafts out of the back.) If I end up with a Cesarean, I’ll be in the office for a follow-up at two weeks. If I manage to do a vaginal birth, I won’t see anyone in Dr. Schwartz’s office (including Dr. Schwartz) for six weeks. (He’ll still manage my insulin and meds during that time, but we’ll do that via email only.)

So, in the meantime I plug away at work stuff and Paul tries to keep me from working too hard. :)

Roller Coaster (36w3d)

Sarah — Wed, 23 Jun 2010 06:33:07 +0000

Poor Paul. I’m having a rough week, so he’s having a rough week.

I assume it’s the pregnancy hormones that are responsible for this. But I’m crying at the drop of a hat. Not at Hallmark commercials or anything (although I did cry at the end of Deadliest Catch this evening.) I just am feeling overwhelmed with the enormity of the changes that are coming towards us. It’s making me cry, a lot, and I don’t like it.

I know Paul and I will be good parents. It’s not that. I know we can care for this baby. I know we’ll be able to handle the upcoming sleepless nights. I know we’ll find a stride with eating, sleeping, & pooping ad nauseum. We’ll get the hang of swaddling. We have diapers (cloth and disposable in newborn sizes) and clothes and dinners for us in our freezer. We’re as ready as we can be on that front.

It’s just…. there’s a lot riding on me these days. My physical endurance and ability to hold my proverbial shit together for another couple of days makes a huge difference in how the first days and weeks of my child’s life will go. My ability to breastfeed him will make a huge difference in his first hours/days/months, and in our finances for the foreseeable future. (The thought of paying for formula strikes fear into my heart – let alone the fact that I don’t want to give my baby formula to begin with.) I’m pushing myself to put up full-time hours at work to keep from burning my paid leave, to keep earning paid leave & benefits at a full-time rate, and to keep bringing home full-time checks. We’re doing OK financially, but not as OK as we were. This was known and expected, it’s just hard to feel the creeping slide. The buck literally and figuratively stops with me in my personal and professional life and I’m feeling the pressure of it more acutely than usual.

I’m a planner. I’m a do-er. Everyone turns to me because I’m usually right, and I do things very well. And for the most part, this works for me. I’m an overbearing bitch by default, so my take-charge attitude serves me well for the most part. But the flip side to this means that I’m lousy at “letting go” and letting other people do things. I’m used to making sure stuff gets done. So these last few weeks of being told to stop doing so much and let others do things and “go with the flow” and “just let it happen” has been making me crazy. For some people, this sounds like a vacation. For me? It’s akin to torture. (Yes, I’m sure this is indicative of some sort of trust issues that I need to work through or something.) But knowing that I’m in control of very little about my body and my mind these days is a very bitter pill for someone like me to swallow. Knowing that come Sunday evening, I will have no control over anything, that I’ll be at the mercy of IVs and Drugs and Doctors.

And then the wild and amazing world of parenthood awaits. I’m happy and excited to be riding this particular roller coaster with Paul at my side… but it’s like that coaster that you *know* you wanted to ride, and everyone says is TEH BEST THING EVAR – but it doesn’t make you question your sanity for wanting to ride it any less as you clank-clank-clank up that first huge hill, and it doesn’t make it any less scary as you tip over the top and all you can see is sky before the track comes up at you again and you’re off on the most thrilling, exciting ride you’ve ever taken.

Paul and I stood in line for a long-ass time to get on this ride. But this first hill is a doozy, and I’m freaking out a little bit. So pardon me if I scream on the way down. I’m sure I’ll be laughing by the first turn – but until then, the anticipation of what’s over that first hill is a little scary.

Amniocentesis FAIL (36w2d)

Sarah — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 22:07:23 +0000

So my fluid was at an all-time low of 4.5 today, and even with Dr. Schwartz’s Jedi-like skills, the amniocentesis couldn’t be completed today. There was one tiny (1.2cm) pocket he was aiming for, but the kid kept putting his arm there when Dr. Schwartz got close with the needle. Paul watched on the monitor as they tried and tried to get into the pocket they were aiming at.

I got jabbed twice though. Not as bad as I thought it would be at all. The pressure was the worst part – until the contractions started. (It’s two hours later and they’re still happening…) It wasn’t pleasant by any means, but I’m not shaking in my boots at the prospect of another one.

So the plan is to wait another week. Since we can’t absolutely confirm that the little guy’s lungs are mature enough to be on the outside, we hang out. I’m still doing OK enough (surprisingly) that we have time before things get to a crisis point. So we’ll continue monitoring me this week, and on Friday I’ll be checked by one of the other doctors in the office. If he sees a big pocket of fluid, they’ll probably go ahead and attempt an amnio – but if not, it’s not a problem. I’m scheduled to arrive at the hospital at 7:30 on Sunday evening to start the induction. Dr. Schwartz will come straight from the airport on Monday morning to check on me, and we’ll take it from there. (Friday’s potential amnio would only be to tell us something wasn’t right – not to give us the go-ahead to induce. The default now has been flipped to induce, as opposed to waiting for confirmation.)

We were pretty disappointed. Paul and I had worked this weekend to get ourselves to a good head space for having the kid today. We felt ready. (well, as ready as one can feel…) So it was a pretty big let down today, and Dr. Schwartz recognized that. But we agree with him that discretion is the better part of valor and to err on the side of caution is a much better way to go right now. Paul is concerned for me having to stick it out another week, but I’m fine. Letting the little man have an extra week is all to the good for him, and I can put up with basically anything for another 6 days.

I’ll be going in to start the induction process at 7:30 on Sunday June 27. It’s entirely possible that the whole process will take 2-3 days. Paul’s birthday is Wednesday the 30th. Could be fun if his son shares his birthday. (Considering Paul was born on his parent’s 3rd anniversary.)

For now though, we’re finally back home. The appointment today was over three hours long with 30 minutes of monitoring before and after the amnio. We know what a contraction looks like on the monitor now! I’m dead on my feet and in a fair amount of pain in my upper-mid back and from the continuing contractions, so I’m gonna lay down for a nap. I’ll be working the rest of this week, so I will be staying busy between monitoring appointments on Wednesday and Friday afternoons.

Sorry for the big build up to nothing, folks.

Cleared for the Weekend, take II (35w6d)

Sarah — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 02:13:49 +0000

Wow. Possibly our last kid-free weekend. EVER. This is kinda hitting me all right now.

Today’s monitoring was pretty routine. The office was INSANE busy, but they were kind enough to squeeze me in early as Paul’s cousin Mike came in for a surprise visit this morning. (My 2:30 appointment wouldn’t have worked so well today.) My fluid was up to 7.4 – which is still crappy, but better than it has been in over a week; so maybe forcing fluids is helping the teeniest bit? Baby showed off his breathing skills and happily kicked at the monitor, so he didn’t have to get buzzed today. (He was doing some serious headspins on my bladder while I was on the monitor though – I actually thought I was gonna wet my pants at one point!!) My BP was not so hot though, 147/97 and 165/103. They took more blood to run my PIH levels, but since I’m scheduled for the amniocentesis on Monday they didn’t feel the need to get uppity about the BP.

So we’re in the clear for Monday morning. No change to the usual routine for this weekend – stay off my feet as much as I can (ha!) and force fluids. The better my fluid is on Monday, the easier it is for Dr. Schwartz to do the amnio. He says he likes a challenge, but I’d prefer that my son not get poked if possible. :)

This weekend…. I dunno. Paul and I still need to pack our hospital bags (I just *hate* packing for anything…) but other than that we’re pretty good. Oh, I need to prep/boil the premie-sized prefolds that Kelly sent us. I’ll boil the hell outta them and then throw them in the wash with the other infant-sized prefolds to make a full load. (At least the half-dozen premie PFs will easily fit into my regular stock pot!) I’m hoping Paul and I can spend some “quality” time together – not that we haven’t been enjoying our time together anyway. But maybe just spend some time together where we’re not running any errands or putting something together – no agenda. Gonna be a long time before we have the opportunity again, methinks.

Paul’s cousin Mike is out for a visit, so Sunday (Father’s Day) will be spent at Paul’s parent’s place. I’m writing this from their patio on Friday evening actually. Paul is on his laptop, Jeanne’s on her iPad and Mike is doing his insane-O workout routine for our comedy enjoyment. The dogs are happily racing around our feet and the breeze is blowing. Ya know, adding a baby to this mix isn’t gonna be a problem at all. :)

Holding Pattern & Why I LOVE Dr. Schwartz (35w4d)

Sarah — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 03:38:48 +0000

Fairly boring appointment today. Did the test for Group B Strep, the results of which should be back on Friday. (Most people carry Group B Strep on them with no worries, but if I’m currently carrying it, the baby can get REAL sick if exposed to it during a vaginal birth. Two doses of antibiotics via IV during labor will take care of it if I am positive.)

Amniotic fluid was back up to a 6 today, so that’s good. Little man was happy to show us how well he practices breathing, and had fun kicking the ultrasound transducer. Monitoring was the same as usual, requiring the buzzer to get things going. But once he woke up, he proceeded to kick the contraction monitor pad for about 5 minutes. His heartrate did a scary little deceleration thing a couple of times, but he bounced back quickly – so that’s OK.

Blood pressure was mixed: 164/97. So it was higher than it has been, but the diastolic was under 100, which is good. Dr. Schwartz said he was OK with my BP today, so yay.

Paul and I chatted with Dr. Schwartz about the plans for the rest of this week and next. (We also talked about developing an iPhone app vs a fee-for-service website…) But once we got home, Paul was explaining to his Dad what my status is and kinda had it all wrong. We talked, but Paul was still pretty convinced that he had it right and that the induction wasn’t happening unless it was an absolute emergency. So I e-mailed Dr. Schwartz. Below is the actual e-mail conversation (along with an explanation of what’s up for the next 5 days):

On Jun 16, 2010, at 8:10 PM, Sarah wrote:

Sorry to bug you, but Paul and I seem to have heard completely different things at today’s appointment and I’m hoping you can clear things up.

I’m under the impression that barring any significant change to my condition, you’ll do a Jedi-worthy amniocentesis on Monday morning which will confirm binary-style whether the little man’s lungs have matured enough to be on the outside. If the test comes back with a yes, you’ll have me report to the hospital Monday evening to start the induction. If the amnio comes back saying baby’s lungs aren’t mature yet, we’ll hang out and do another amnio a week later to check lung maturity then.

Paul is under the impression that I’m not being induced until the situation becomes an emergency, and that Monday’s scheduled amnio is just to give us an idea if the baby could handle being outside the womb when that crisis time comes, whenever that is.

So, who’s got it right?

Sarah
——-
Hi,

As is probably the case in any disagreements that you and Paul might have, YOU heard correctly and Paul is wrong. Please feel free to refer Paul to this email throughout the rest of your life.

JKS

Sent from my iPhone

I LOVE my OB so freaking much. So we’re just hanging out for monitoring on Friday and then the amniocentesis on Monday morning. We’ll have results that afternoon, and either we’ll be at the hospital that evening, or we won’t.

Updating from home… (35w3d)

Sarah — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 19:43:55 +0000

I was totally expecting to get sent to the hospital today, but I got sent back home! Yay!

Dr. Schwartz re-did the fluid check and is confident he saw 5.5-6 worth of fluid in there. Heck, he even thinks there’s enough that he could do the amnio on Monday. He says he likes a challenge. My BP was fantastic today, with the diastolic under 90!! (I forget, it was 140-something/80-something.)

So I’m home now, gonna go take a nap. Monitoring and Group B Strep test tomorrow. We’ll see how it goes. I’ve got a monitoring appointment on Friday and the amnio scheduled for Monday morning.

Oh, and Dr. Schwartz obliged Paul while he was hunting for fluid and took some measurements. The little man is weighing in at just a tad over 5 pounds right now. Not sure about his length cuz the measurements were kinda all over the place, but the weight is a good estimate at least. Our little bag of sugar! :)

Possible change in plans… (35w2d)

Sarah — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 22:12:47 +0000

Today’s appointment for monitoring was pretty darned good. I walked in feeling better than I have in a while. Excellent blood pressure again (147/90) and after some not-so-gentle prodding, good numbers from the kid on the monitoring strip. (He did not appreciate me chugging half a bottle of ice water to get him to move and getting my whole belly woggled by the nurse.) Trace amounts of protein in the urine (up from zero) but not OMG either.

The bad part comes during the ultrasound where they’re measuring the amniotic fluid around the boy. The levels should be around 14 on average, with 5-25 being the extreme low and high ends of the scale. Anything at or below 5 is cause for major concern. I’ve been sliding down that scale and was at a 6 on Wednesday and Friday last week. I forced fluids this weekend, making sure I was taking in well over 100 ounces a day in the hopes of bumping up that number.

Today all the head nurse could get was 4.8 – and that was after 20 minutes of looking and looking all over. So the oligohydramnios is very much in affect. What exactly this means, we’re not sure. We know it ain’t good, but the fact that this is happening towards the end of the pregnancy as opposed to towards the beginning is good. If it were at the beginning, it would be because of some abnormality with the baby. Now it’s just a culmination of my pre-existing medical conditions: hypothyroidism, hypertension & diabetes.

Dr. Schwartz is in his other office across town today and tomorrow, so they called him while we were at the office to see what he wanted to do. We were sure he was gonna send me over to the hospital. But he asked to see me in his other office tomorrow instead. So we’re taking that as a sign that there’s no need to totally freak out just yet. Mostly what oligohydramnios means at this point is that delivery is gonna be a bit more complicated and the chances of a cesarean are probably higher. There isn’t anything they can really do to reverse it – like putting me on a saline IV to pump me full of fluids or something. (There are some therapies that involve pumping fluid directly into the placenta, but those are mostly for use *during* labor.) There isn’t enough amniotic fluid around the baby to *do* an amniocentesis – so we don’t know how much that will blow out next week’s plans. With such decreased levels of fluid/cushioning around the baby right now, the chances of him laying on his umbilical cord and squashing his blood/oxygen/nutrient flow increase. This is where I am SO GLAD that I completely trust Dr. Schwartz and his knowledge/experience in treating high risk women like me. Whatever he says tomorrow is OK with us. If he still wants me to try for a regular birth, I’m all for it – but if this situation necessitates a cesarean from the get-go, we’re OK with that too. Whatever gets our little man out safely.

So this afternoon and this evening are final prep, just in case. All bags are being packed (we were doing laundry this morning already) and final arrangements are being made. I’m gonna try to go get my nails done. Gonna get the Ragu Bolognese made and in the freezer, along with the Creamy Italian Chicken. (There’s a lot of simmering involved there – I’m not gonna be slaving over a stove.) We’re hoping that Murphy’s Law will kick in if we get all this stuff done tonight. Paul is pretty anxious, but I’m doing pretty OK. I am keenly aware that I need to stay calm, and having tasks to focus on helps me greatly with that.

We’ll update tomorrow after the appointment here and on Facebook. (Facebook will probably get updated faster because it’s easier to do from our phones.) We’re halfway expecting to be told to go to the hospital from our 9:00am appointment. I’m all the more glad that we have a 7:45am appointment to meet the pediatrician tomorrow. Gonna be a busy day. Prayers would be appreciated.

Weekend Plans (35w)

Sarah — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 13:40:59 +0000

I have to keep reminding myself that this weekend isn’t necessarily our “last” weekend. I’m thinking it would be nice for Paul and I to go out or something – like on a date while we still can, either this weekend or next weekend. We’ll see.

This weekend is errands and more prep.

I have a coupon for USA Baby for 20% off any one thing. I called, and that includes breast pumps – which is unheard of. Babies R Us (BRU) has a coupon right now for 15% off breast pumps, and I was crazy excited about that. But when the dang thing starts at $280, I’ll take another 5% and smile. The plan is to rent a hospital-grade pump for the first month, and then switch to the personal style if everything is working OK. If for whatever reason I can’t used the personal pump, I’ll return it since the box will be unopened. Yes, my cheapness knows no bounds.
Gotta swing by BRU anyway to try to exchange some clothes that we bought in April. They had an incredible sale that we took advantage of, as a hedge against the shower. I assumed most of it would get returned (or at least half) because of the bounty we got at the shower, but when Paul and I sorted through it all this week, he convinced me to keep all of it. There’s a couple of heavier terrycloth sleepers and an adorable sweatsuit that are in 6mo sizes that I’d like to swap for 9mo, since I’m afraid that the little man will be a size 6 in like September or October when it would still be too warm to wear them. I am hoping to keep my resolve and not make any other purchases while I’m there. Heh. We’ll see how that goes. (The little guy’s closet is pretty full now though – so I keep reminding myself of that.)
Groceries for dinners gotta happen today. I’m gonna make a couple of our favorite dinners in bulk this weekend (Ragu Bolognese and Creamy Italian Chicken at least) and freeze them in containers so we can have some home-cooked meals for a bit after the little guy comes home. So a bit of groceries and a grip of rubbermaid containers are on the list as well.

Other than that…. I’ve got one more load of baby laundry to do: all the receiving blankets and burp cloths and baby socks. I’ve been enjoying doing this laundry this week, folding and putting away the clothes that will be in the first pictures of my son’s life. Reveling in the fact that I have these tiny clothes at all in my house. Smiling smugly that I now have opinions on brands and know that Carter’s runs tall and skinny, Gerber runs even skinnier and smaller and Circo seems to be made for Amazons. Even with my rock-hard belly as a constant reminder, I’m still caught off guard by the knowledge that we’re having a baby.

I need to pack my hospital bag and the little bag for baby. We have a total of three Newborn sized outfits to choose from to bring the baby home in, and Paul already has veto’d one. (“My son isn’t coming home in something that looks suspiciously like a Dodgers uniform!”) That’s fine, one of remaining two outfits has stripes AND a dinosaur. I think we all know what the little guy will come home in. :)

This weekend we’ll build the bouncer and set up the Pack and Play – all the random stuff we’ve been putting off. Oh, and I’m bringing up the whole idea of actually having a name for the child several times a day. Not getting very far, but I figure Paul will get sick of me bugging him eventually and we’ll figure something out. hee!