Monthly Archives: June 2010

Weekend Update (34w1d)

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I’m feeling pretty good this weekend. A bit of a headache, which is either BP related or just standard pregnancy. Dunno. Baby is kicking like a total freak all weekend. Not sure what that is about. I’ve stayed on the couch most of the weekend, mostly because that’s what I’m apparently supposed to do; but also there’s a fair amount of pain and pressure when I’m up and about for too long. And sometimes 10 minutes is too long. I’m having more Braxton-Hicks contractions that I’ve ever had too. So that’s something I’ll be mentioning at my next appointment. I’ve got appointments on Monday, Wednesday and Friday for monitoring and I’ll see Dr. Schwartz on Wednesday.

Nesting (or at least my form of it) has set in, I think. I’m more motivated to get things organized. I’m not cleaning cupboards or scrubbing things – let’s not get crazy here. But Saturday evening Paul and I organized all the baby’s clothes and gear that we have so far. I’ve washed all the hand-me-downs and all the new clothes that aren’t on hangers, sorted them all and put them into the dressers by size. Paul brought in some storage cubes and put them on the floor in the baby’s closet, so there’s a place to store all the random toys and gear and whatnot that shouldn’t just be laying around. He set up the froggy humidifier and the turtle nightlight and got the diaper changing pad installed while I futzed with clothing. Next up, we’ll wash and re-hang the stuff on hangers, organizing the closet as we go by size.

(I’m amazed at the HUGE difference in sizing between brands. I’m fairly certain that the Gerber brand size 0-3 onesies would fit the baby *right now* as opposed to the Circo brand size 0-3 onesies that look like they would fit our 14 pound cat fairly well. And then there’s the Carter’s stuff that within the same dang size is all over the place! Ah well, variety and spices and whatnot, right?)

We also figured out the complexities of car seats and their installation today. Turns out that the LATCH system in both our newer cars is the best thing ever. Since it’s eleventy billion degrees outside this week, we’re not gonna bother to install the car seat yet – but at least we know how now. (Also, for the time being we’re going to use the carrier-based car seat in my car, since it’s not like I’m going anywhere with the baby without Paul for a while. The carrier-based car seat is better suited to a smaller baby as opposed to the larger convertible seat we have for my car.)

So this week we’ll get my hospital bag mostly packed. I’ve got nearly everything I need – and I’ll be picking up two nursing bras (that will be too small I’m sure, but they’ll work for now) tomorrow. I’ve got a big list of stuff for my hospital bag, so we’ll pack as much as we can that isn’t day-to-day stuff. The rest of the stuff can get tossed in before we head to the hospital. I’ll deal with proper-fitting nursing bras once sizing sorts itself out. I found a couple good tutorials about turning regular bras into nursing bras, so I’m gonna go that route since they don’t make nursing bras in my size.

So I’m home now, not going back into the office for some time, barring something fairly extraordinary. I knocked myself out on Thursday and Friday to get my stuff wrapped up so I could move my base of work operations home. The plan is that I’m still going to work full time until the baby comes – and I’ve got enough projects and tasks to do that for 2 weeks at least. I want to burn as little paid time as possible before the baby actually gets here. After the baby arrives, I’ll still do some work from home while I’m on maternity leave: payroll, accounts payable and a monthly report or two. Not a huge amount of work, but stuff that I already do, would be difficult to train someone on in less than two months, and allows me to not burn time (and actually earn some back.) I’m so grateful that my supervisor and I have been able to work out an accommodation that works for the agency and for me. This is kind of uncharted territory for my agency, so it’s kind of try-it-and-see. It’s amazing what can be accomplished with a laptop, RDC, e-fax and a printer at home.

So lots going on this week, combined with me trying to stay as calm and relaxed as possible with my feet up at nearly all times. Should be interesting. I have no idea when this kid is gonna come – I figure there’s at least a chance we could be sent to the hospital after every appointment this week. So that should be fun.

All about Prefolds! (34w1d)

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Preface: if you could care less about how we’re going to diaper this kid or why we chose the method we did – go ahead and skip this posting.

I talked about cloth diapering a bit a couple of months ago, but we decided to go with a different type of diapers (to start with at least) after I did more research. (We might start out in disposables anyway, especially if our little guy comes as soon as we think he might and is very wee.)

The type of diapers we’re using are referred to as Prefolds. They’re similar to the cloth diapers that our parents used on us – absorbent cotton layers within a moisture-barrier cover. But whereas the diapers our moms used on us were single layers (flats) that required piling 4-8 layers on top of each other, pinning them onto us and then stuffing our huge fluffy butts into plastic/rubber pants with really tight leg gathers to prevent leaking… today’s prefolds and covers are a much easier, thinner option.

The term ‘prefold’ and opposed to ‘flat’ means that there are varying layers sewn into the diaper, in thirds. So the left and right thirds of the diaper are thinner than the middle third, expressed as #x#x# – so a 4x8x4 has four layers on the left and right sides, and 8 layers in the middle. MUCH easier to achieve the necessary absorbency without trying to pin 8 whole diapers onto a squirming baby!

The covers are single layer, moisture-resistant (I’m hesitant to tempt fate by saying moisture-proof) material in the shape of a disposable diaper with velcro tabs. The prefold diaper can be folded and applied to the baby using a Snappi (or pins) or just folded in thirds, laid into the cover and applied like a disposable diaper. (Folding and using a Snappi is preferred as it will contain baby poo much better.) The covers usually don’t get messy when the diaper is changed and can be used several times before needing a wash. Rotating through two covers during the day gives time for the cover to air out between uses. (Of course, if the cover gets wet or dirty, it goes into the diaper pail with the dirty prefold it held.)

We decided to go with prefolds and covers for a couple of reasons:

  • Prefolds and covers are more customizable in sizes than the AIO (all in one) or pocket diaper options we were looking at. The covers are adjustable in size, and there are myriad sizes and thicknesses of prefolds to choose from.
  • Prefolds can be used on newborns much easier than AIO diapers because you can use to use thinner inserts. Less layers between newborn baby’s legs is good.
  • Prefolds are less picky than other types of diapers. With other materials (microfiber, fleece, hemp, etc) you can’t use diaper creams and have to pay much closer attention to your washing routine. The materials are very sensitive to build up from detergents or hard water and will start to repel moisture, which causes diapers to leak like mad. Cotton prefolds are much hardier and actually work better the harder you wash & dry them. (Detergent choices are still important with cloth diapers though, as you don’t want to strip the moisture-resistance from the covers nor do you want the chance of enzymes or brighteners to not be rinsed from the diapers which could cause a nasty rash when combined with baby pee.) Another benefit of cloth diapering is that diaper rashes are almost unheard-of, but if a rash happens you don’t have to worry about ruining your expensive pocket diapers by using diaper cream.

I’ve purchased 3.5 dozen infant-sized and 3 dozen regular-sized prefolds along with a dozen covers, which should be enough of a stash to get us through diapering this kid from start to finish. (Cost on all that was just over the cost of 2 months of disposable diapers.) We might still purchase some pocket/AIO style diapers (like the ones I originally blogged about) but we’re not sure. Those all-in-one styles are easier to use, but word on the diaper forums I frequent is that once you start using prefolds, you just don’t wanna use anything else! We’ll see. I’m just glad that I’ve found options out there that we can afford!

I color-coded all the prefolds by running a blue or red zigzag stitch along the serged edges – thinking that once we’re using both sizes together it will be easier for Paul to tell them apart at a glance by checking the color as opposed to the size. (An infant-sized layer inside a regular-sized layer can make all the difference for staying dry during a long nap when the little guy is 6 months old!)

I had some fun last weekend prepping the prefolds for use. That’s the only downside to prefolds – the first-time prep of them. You have to wash them with hot water 5-10 times (drying in-between) to wash out ALL the natural wax and oil from the unbleached cotton and to get them to shrink up fully and “quilt” to full absorbency. But I found a shortcut on one of my diaper forums: BOIL THEM!! Two stock pots and two hours later, 3.5 dozen diapers were ready to be put into service! Boiling the prefolds for 15 minutes did the work of 3 full cycles through the washer and dryer. I was able to wash them all twice in the washing machine and after the 2nd time through the dryer, they’re SO soft and fluffy! Even Paul was impressed and remarked that he thought they’d make good diapers!

So our schedules will be enriched with the addition of 2-3 extra loads of laundry a week. But the cost savings over disposables, and the benefit of knowing we’re not tossing 60-80 diapers a week into the local landfill is well worth it to us. The laundry part won’t be a thing at all, especially while I’m exclusively breastfeeding our little man. EBF baby poop is totally water soluble, so with a regular wash + an extra rinse, our baby’s diapers will be perfectly clean – and so will our washing machine. We have enough diapers to do laundry every 2nd or 3rd day (assuming 12-15 every 24 hours) so we won’t be struggling to keep up. Once baby starts on solids, we’ll dump the poo into the toilet (we’ll install a little sprayer onto the supply line for the toilet to help spray off the diaper) and wash everything the same way. Wet diapers are wet diapers, regardless of how old he is.

Paul and I are happy with our choice. We know it’s not for everyone, but we think it will work for us. If anyone has any questions about cloth diapers, I’m happy to answer them or provide links to where I got the info that helped us make our choice. Here’s a couple of my favorites:

  • Little Lions is who all our prefolds came from. They have great prices on seconds and clearance specials as well as great customer service. They also have some great info about cloth diapering in general.
  • Luv your Baby Products are the supplies of Kawaii Baby diapers in the US and Canada. The lady who runs the place is amazing and has seen her business explode in the last year thanks to favorable ratings on diaper forums. I got our covers from LuvYourBaby and I’ll purchase pocket/AIO diapers there too if we go that way.
  • DiaperSwappers is a fantastic CD (cloth diapering) forum and sales resource. It’s probably the biggest clearinghouse for the used CD market anywhere and is a VAST resource of CD knowledge from amazingly helpful mamas all over the world.

LOLercoaster + Tilt-a-Whirl (33w5d)

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I feel like I’m getting jerked around and I don’t like it.

Today everything seems to be fine! No really. Like according to everything today I’m barely pre-eclamptic. Apparently once you’re in the pre-eclamptic zone you don’t get out, but you can vary within the zone from mild to moderate to severe. Today I’m at the mild end. Which is great. My blood pressure was 147/97 today, as compared with 157/110 yesterday.*

Except: if I’m barely worse off than I was two weeks ago (no protein showing up on today’s dip stick) then why am I being forced to modify my work schedule and burn my precious paid leave for nothing? Why can’t I work at least half days in the office? (I’m wanting to be in the office because there’s stuff I can do there that I can’t do at home – the amount of stuff I have to do at home is finite and will get burned through in this next week for sure in order for me to keep up full-time hours.)

YES, OF COURSE I’m happy that things look rosier today. Healthier Mama means baby stays put which is a good thing. OF COURSE. This is just all very hard to take on 3 hours of sleep (cried myself to sleep finally last night and was up at 4:30am this morning) with hormone overload raging. I feel so completely out of control and that scares me and makes me angry.

Yes, I’m a control freak – but it’s not that. I literally feel like I’m being told different things each time I go in now and it’s hard to assimilate them all together and find a way to waddle through the next day or three before the next appointment where I’ll be told who-knows-what. Going with the flow when your health, your baby’s health, and your family’s financial stability are all on the line is really very difficult to do. And being constantly told to calm down and relax and just let everything in the world go doesn’t help. (I appreciate everyone’s support, really I do…. it’s just hard advice to follow.)

So for now, we’re stable (?) in this mild pre-eclamptic state. I did get the 2nd steroid shot today, so at least those are doing their thing – with their peak of efficacy in about 7 days. I’m planning on going into the office again tomorrow for a half day because there’s stuff I need to wrap up there still. Depending on how things go at my monitoring appointment on Monday, I may go into the office for a half day or two next week as well. I don’t feel that I’m pushing it to do that, especially if my blood pressure is barely higher than it was two weeks ago. If BP readings are creeping up, I’ll stay home. I have monitoring appointments M-W-F next week, and I actually see Dr. Schwartz on Wednesday. They’ll do a urine dip-stick at each appointment which I guess is the starting point for worry if it comes up with anything.

*To recap BP over the last few weeks for perspective:

Date
BP
June-3
147/97
June-2
157/110
May-26
155/97
May-19
131/83
Apr-28
138/85

Pre-Eclampsia (33w4d)

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We knew this was a possibility. Just didn’t think it would actually happen so dang fast. (But to put it in perspective, Dr. Schwartz expected to see symptoms of pre-eclampsia in me by 28 weeks or so. It usually shows up in non-hypertensive, non-diabetic, non-obese, non-thyroid-challenged women between 32-37 weeks. So the fact that I got to nearly 34 weeks with my medical history is astounding.)

Fetal Monitoring appointment today went well. Baby was head down (again) and cooperating with holding still for the monitor. It wasn’t strapped so tightly to me this time, so he wasn’t kicking at it. I actually fell asleep for a little bit while being monitored.

But when they took my blood pressure, things got a little scary. 157/110, up from 138/83 two weeks ago. (It was ~150/97 last week) And that’s with hella medication. The results of my 24-hour urine test came back in the mid 300’s, which indicates mild/moderate (as opposed to severe) pre-eclampsia.

None of this is a surprise. What Dr. Schwartz told us about at the beginning of this 3rd trimester is coming true. The hope is that the creeping up of my blood pressure stays slow/moderate, and that the protein count doesn’t skyrocket. More labs were taken today and the results will be in tomorrow – which will give a more exact look at what the situation is. I’m not showing many other symptoms – and especially none of the symptoms of HELLP syndrome. But I’m up 2 pounds this week, so that’s a tad worrisome.

If things are getting worse quickly, Dr. Schwartz will have to hospitalize me for more intensive monitoring (BP readings every 15 minutes, IV therapy, fetal monitoring, etc.) Nobody wants that – cuz it would stress me right the hell out. Being in the hospital (by definition, uncomfortable) wasting paid leave with no baby, strapped to a bed would just suck SO bad. And it’s possible that I could be monitored for up to a week before things reach a critical point where the baby has to come out. So that would be a TON of paid leave down the drain. If I’m allowed to be at home, at least I can still do *some* work, and Paul is here to keep a close eye on me. We live like 7 minutes from the hospital if that becomes necessary.

In preparation of the baby coming much sooner than anticipated, I got the first of two steroid shots today. (Supposedly they burn like crazy, but I didn’t feel it at all!) For those who know or care, I’m being given Betamethasone.

So here we are. I’ve been told I can’t go into the office any longer. Dr. Schwartz didn’t get into specifics right yet, but basically I need to be off my feet as much as humanly possible, with feet elevated. And most importantly, I need to be in a calm environment, away from stress. I need to go into the office tomorrow to collect some things and wrap up some stuff, but I’ll be leaving at noon for my 1:00pm appointment. I might go in for a couple hours on Friday too. Cuz seriously, I wasn’t ready to not be in the office quite yet.

Dr. Schwartz is back at home in Denver until Monday, so he’ll call me during my appointment tomorrow to go over my lab results and answer whatever questions we come up with by then. He’ll be back in the office for a 9-day stretch starting on Monday, so I have a strong suspicion that he’ll deliver me during that time, assuming I don’t need to be delivered this weekend for some reason.

As far as baby goes: he’s doing OK at this point as far as we can tell. He was 4 pounds exactly two weeks ago, so we’re assuming he’s somewhere between 4.5-5lbs right now. Our concern for delivering him soon is his lung maturity. The steroids they gave me today (and tomorrow) are designed to kick his lungs into high gear to make surfactant to make it easier for him to breathe. He’ll have to spend some time in the NICU when he comes, but we don’t know how long – could be 2-4 days, could be 2 weeks or more. No way to know until he gets here. If we make it to 36 weeks (doubtful) they can use amniocentesis to check the development of his lungs, but prior to 36 weeks, there isn’t much they can do to check. If he comes sooner than that, it will be because my body just can’t take being pregnant anymore.

We’ll have a better idea of where we stand after tomorrow’s appointment. I already have appointments for Monday, Wednesday and Friday next week for fetal monitoring. Here’s hoping I can keep those.

I still need to pack my hospital bag. I need to wash some baby clothes and put things away in drawers and in his closet. I need to go out and buy some preemie-sized clothing and onesies. It never occurred to us that we could have a preemie. We knew the pregnancy would almost assuredly have a bumpy ending, but having a preemie never occurred to us. I can’t believe I’m typing that word.

I don’t know how to deal with this, really. I’m a planner, and I can’t plan anything right now. I don’t know how things are going to go or what my options are anymore. I don’t know how nursing/pumping gets dealt with in a NICU situation. What do we do with ourselves when we can’t be at the NICU? Does it make me a terrible parent that I’m still worrying about getting to work during all of this? I’m vacillating between abject terror and a preternatural calm, both stemming the knowledge that I am in control of absolutely none of this. I’m going with the flow, because I don’t have any other choice. I’m doing my best to stay calm because stress really doesn’t help the situation. Prayers would be appreciated though. An update will happen as soon as possible after the appointment tomorrow afternoon.