[setting: a dimly lit living room, with the TV on in the background]

Mama: (to sleeping baby in her arms) [Tearful mushiness about how much he’s loved and what a life-changing miracle he is. Blathering continues about how beautiful he is, and how Daddy is going to be his best friend]

Kieran: [faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart]

Oh the joys of having a boy. I’ve tried to explain to him that the time wherein farting and burping are encouraged is finite, so he better enjoy it while he can.